99th POST SPECIAL: TV Series Recommendations

Girl’s Top Five Genre Picks:

1. The Cartoon - Naruto - Guy got me started watching this animation series out of Japan and it is definitely up my alley!

2. The Sitcom - How I Met Your Mother - Willow has grown up and out of that lesbian phase.

3. The One-Hour Drama - Breaking Bad - I go to movies for drama, and, I mean, there is drama in everything... So, even though I’ve never seen a single episode, I recommend this off the hype Guy and my brother have created around the series.

4. The One-Hour Sci-Fi/Fantasy - Fringe - I hated (like, seriously, hated) Denethor, The Steward of Gondor in Minas Tirith. When he makes Pippin sing while Faramir rides to his death... What an asshole! So, the fact I almost cry every time Walter Bishop gets sad in Fringe goes to show how captivating an actor John Noble is.

5. The Nostalgic Pick - News Radio - Just for a fun, if you haven’t seen an episode of this old series, you should. It was a pretty good sitcom.

Guy’s Top Five Genre Picks:

1. The Cartoon - Cowboy Bebop - I know this is an oldie but I think is relevant that people sit down and watch this great anime considering it’s being made into a live action movie in the States. Hopefully they won’t screw it up as bad as they did Dragon Ball.

2. The Sitcom - Rules of Engagement - The show might not be a huge laugh but the acting and comedy of Patrick Warburton is awesome. He’ll make me laugh in every scene that he’s in.

3. The One-Hour Drama - Sons of Anarchy - This series started off kinda slow but now in my opinion it’s in the ranks of “The Sopranos”. The best crime drama on television right know. Third season is coming up so get the first two on DVD.

4. The One-Hour Sci-Fi/Fantasy - Fringe - Girl is a 110% percent right Walter Bishop will make your heart quiver in every scene he’s in. On another note this series is complex, funny, full of great special effects and you actually feel for every single character. What else do you need?

5. The DVD/Bluray-Box Set - Battlestar Galactica - It feels like it’s been awhile since this show was on TV. Well, now you don’t have to watch reruns, just get the complete series and enjoy it over a full week or something. “Caprica” is not gonna fill the void that this show left behind. Let’s just hope the DVDs will.

BLADE TRINITY

Guy´s pay your taxes...

Wesley hasn’t been seen for the longest time now and I wish that he would come back and reprise his role as Blade. I guess he had some trouble with the government when it came to paying his taxes. So now Blade is dead in the water and if I get my say, I would say that it ended on a low note.

Blade II is fantastic thanks to Del Toro and the first in the trilogy has one of the coolest opening scenes in the superhero genre. However nr. 3 is not that exciting. Sure Biel bulked up and came of as a hard ass and Girl’s favorite Ryan Reynolds started a long career in this genre.I guess he will have the record in appearing in different superhero movies (Green Lantern, Deadpool, Wolverine and this).

I love anything with vampires which makes me enjoy this movie somewhat. I just felt that Wesley overplayed his character and the movie just looked bland in general. I think a rewamp is in order and that they should attach a new Blade and a cool new director such as Zach Snyder or something.

Guy’s Rating: I love Blade and I guess this gets to be a part of the vampire collection anyway.

Girl’s yummy...

Did you see the scene where Ryan Reynolds is chained down and shirtless? I did. The Prison Break guy isn't that bad to look at, either.

Girl’s Rating: Not the best (Biel’s character is super annoying), but still fun.

LÉON: THE PROFESSIONAL

Girl’s finally...

Hmmm. Interesting. This is what everyone has been talking about.

To be honest? I wasn’t an immediate fan. Natalie Portman kind of creeps me out as a little girl who wants to kill people. I get it. She is upset about her family dying and was a bit odd to begin with. The scene when she walks past the door to his is a great scene! But she is still creepy to me. Maybe because she is the witch of Hollywood, creating trouble wherever she goes... The character of Leon is amazing and Reno peaked as an actor with this role.

Girl’s Rating: As a whole, this movie was pretty awesome and is a must see. Did it make my favorites? No.

Guy’s Review...

When I found out that Girl had missed this gem I immediately got the Bluray release and popped it into the player. I told her that I wished that I was her so that this would be the first time I saw it as well.

Luc Besson was genius in the 80’s and 90’s. He made this, “The Fifth Element” and “ The Big Blue”. All these movies are great and “Léon” is probably the one to beat. It had gone some time since I saw this but I was as sucked in as the first time when I saw it. He uses music and cameras in a way that sets him apart from any other filmmaker. Isn’t that what you want as a guy in the arts. The ability for an audience to recognize your work from the first screen.

I hope everybody has seen this movie by now and that the know the story about the little girl that has her family killed and the hitman that takes her in. A weird couple that creates an amazing bond in a fucked up world.

For the actors. This is Jean Reno’s (Léon) best role to date and he will sadly never ever do anything better than this. At least not when keeps popping up in movies like “The Pink Panther”. Gary Oldman showed everybody that he was the one to beat when it comes to portraing villains. Pretending to be listening to Beethoven as he kills women and children is truly terrifying.

Guy’s Rating: One of the best movies... all time.

MISSION IMPOSSIBLE II

Guy now knows that he was an idiot as a teen.

There’s a bunch of action movies that I would defend to the end that I watched as a kid that now would be considered trash. Movies like “Commando”, “Double Impact” and “Universal Soldier”. I almost feel ashamed that I liked “M:I:2” when I was a young teen. I think I was too caught up in John Woo and thought that he could do nothing wrong (“Face/Off”, “Killer”, “Hard Target”). Now later in his career he’s ruined any chance to come back to Hollywood with blunders like “Windtalkers” and “Paycheck”.

Watching this again I almost found it laughable. There’s sooooo many slow motions scenes that if they took them away the movie would be half an hour long. Tom Cruise should never have had that semi long hair. He’s way too pretty that he almost looks like a girl.

Guy’s Rating: Watch Brian De Palma’s “Mission Impossible” instead, it holds up.

Girl agrees. No review or rating necessary.

YOUTH IN REVOLT

Guy’s Review...

When I first saw the trailer to this movie it looked like was gonna be one of the funniest movies of the year. The concept was funny and so is Michael Cera. During the viewing however I didn’t find myself laughing out loud that much, there was only a couple of snickers that got let out. Don’t get me wrong now afterwards I have realized that the movie was very funny.

There’s more than a comedy here however. That’s probably the reason for the lack of laughter. You get to bogged up in the characters and take them a little bit to seriously. I’ve figured out during this film that characters that are to well developed are not as funny as the once that just fart and hit there heads.

It might sound like I don’t like this movie by now but I did. Cera’s badass character Francois is amazingly funny and says all the things an akward teenager would dream about to muster up the strength to say. There’s a good love story here as well that might be hard to understand but hard not to like.

Guy’s Rating: I really think that this was good... think...

Girl’s ?

I love Michael Cera. His delivery is great. I laughed because of him a lot of times during this film... But that was about it. Everything else just left me asking questions...

What was up with his girlfriend? Why was she so crazy? Was I the only one who noticed that? What was up with that girl from Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist? Why is she always stoned or drunk and WHY was she dating Steve Buchemi?? Why didn’t Justin Long make me laugh like he normally does? Who made his character and why was he only in the movie for a minute? And how was Cera’s character able to blow up a building and then run away from the scene?? Then get away from the cops for such a long time? How incompetent were these cops?? And when will Ray Liotta stop playing the character from Goodfellas or derivatives of him?

Girl’s Rating: I want a movie about Micheal Cera without all the claymation and crazy girlfriend crap.

THE WOLFMAN

Guy’s Review...

Max Von Sydow must be the hardest working man in show business. He was in “Solomon Kane” for three minutes, “Robin Hood” for like 15 and now this for like four minutes. I wonder what he charges per minute? I bet pretty well. Except for him this movie has a pretty impressive cast. Hopkins is always great and so is Weaving. I have to say that Del Toro was a little bit of a disappointment here.

The movie is about an actor that finds out that his brother has gone missing. He returns to his hometown to find that they’ve found him dead. When he sees the body it’s completely torn apart. Some kind of animal did it. Well, he goes to find out and when he find the animal it turns out to be a werewolf. He get bit and starts to turn. The rest of the movie is pretty much basic in this genre. He tries to fight it but gives in.

There some twist and turns in the story but nothing that exciting. You can pretty much figure it out within the first twenty minutes if you’re a little bit sharp. It looks great but all in all it feels like a bloodier version of “Van Helsing”. This is not a good thing.

Guy’s Rating: Some good gore but that’s not enough.

Girl’s thoughts on wolves and bears...

First off, Hopkins is awesome and should not stop doing movies with this one. As an angry, distant and wolf-ish (har har) old man he is always a good choice. Something about his crooked eyes and lop-sided grin gives him a natural grim appearance. The bushy beard helps, too.

Second, the whole asylum thing was pretty interesting. The ONLY interesting thing about Del Toro’s character.

And that’s about it for good things. Bad things? The twist was revealed in the trailer. Del Toro’s performance was bland. The whole killing in the name of love thing has soooo been done, and, uhm, that was your dead brother’s wife, Del Toro! Shame. And, finally, Weaving was just not in the movie for long enough.

Girl’s Rating: Has anyone seen The Edge? Because you should. As for this mumbo jumbo, the twist was just way too obvious to make it worth watching.

KRULL

Girl’s cop out...

I cannot review this as I didn’t watch the whole movie. I fell asleep.

Maybe I was just too late watching this (this was my first time), but something about it was just creepy.

Girl’s Rating: If you haven’t watched this yet... Don’t.

Guy’s YES!!...

I know, I know this movie is not the best of the best but I grew up with it and have grown to enjoy it. It was made in a time where all everybody wanted was another “Star Wars”, They took the recipe and made this. It had the prince, the hero, the old wise man, an evil emperor and everything else that you need to make a good adventure movie.

I saw it as a child and loved when the lesser wizard turned himself into all kinds of different animals, especially the dog. Later in my teens I became a fan of Liam Neeson’s acting and found on Imdb that this was one of his first projects. I went back to the movie again and found it as enjoyable if not even more than when I watched it as a child. Today it’s a part of my DVD collection and now I’ve shown it to my favorite critic... Girl.

Guy’s Rating: Still rocks!

THE BOOK OF ELI

Girl’s review...

Best scene in this whole movie happens within the first 15 minutes when Washington encounters a group of thieves on the road. His clipped dialogue and the ensuing fight sequence was perfect entertainment.

The rest of the movie had it’s interesting moments, but whoever cast that girl from That 70s Show was not thinking correctly. She just didn’t seem desperate enough, or believable as a sometimes whore slash enslaved bar wench in this future time. Nor did I want to see the end when she took off on her own with Washington’s wicked machete as her new toy.

Even though Kelsey’s on-again-off-again girlfriend ruined most of the second half of the movie for me, Washington’s character made up for the majority of the disappointments.

Girl’s Rating: For me, it was worth the watch. For everyone else, if only to see the first 30 minutes... Then put something else on.

Guy’s Review...

To answer the question wether or not that Denzel’s blind in this movie... Well he is. It’s pretty obvious if you pay attention during the movie. There’s even a close up on his eye in the end where he recites the bible.

As an action movie this is pretty good. There’s some cool shot outs and some sweet machete scenes here that will keep the gore fiends hooked in for the duration of the flick. As an idea this movie is good as well. War has scorched the earth, everybody is wearing sunglasses, water is scarce and there’s mostly anarchy all over the place. Denzel has the last bible and he’s protecting it by any means necessary. Lucky for him his pretty skilled at taking people out.

Then there’s Gary Oldman. He plays the bad guy that wants the Bible and wants to use it as a weapon. We all know that Oldman is the best when it comes to villains so you won’t be dissapointed in his delivery here,

When it comes to the plot line it could have been worked on a little bit harder. I mean one bible that will change everything. A blind man defending it? Unless he’s Zatochi I won’t buy it. They pretty much just took “Mad Max” and made it a little bit less better.

Guy’s Rating: I might have slammed it a little bit but it’s still entertaining.

VALHALLA RISING

Girl’s general confusion...

This was another movie that I just couldn’t stand watching from start to finish. I believe my overall impression would best be described as a giant “?”.

There was a lot of flashes to a red-coloured land located in Mads’ character’s brain - a version of himself, I think. There was a this kid that spoke for Mads as we guess he could not communicate - possibly due to having no tongue or maybe because he just did not want to...? Mads murdered A LOT of people, and one guy was raped by some other guy when they both were fucked up on some drink, and then there was this whole religious crusade thing... Then the ending! What the fuck happened there? In Denmark, the critics were divided in two concerning this film. One said that it was stupidly self-important and the other called it a masterpiece.

The visuals were stunning. That can be said for the movie.

Girl’s Rating: Hmmm... Maybe watch it? Just for love of Mads?

Guy’s what?

I’m a big fan of Mads and that was probably the only thing that made me wanna watch this movie. I loved him in “After the Wedding” and that film will probably be on my top 100 for a long time.

This movie how ever was fucked up. Mads is viking named one-eye that can take down any man in one on one combat. He’ll bite your neck, remove your guts and pop your eyes out. Yes, this movie is very, very violent. That is pretty much it too. I couldn’t follow the “storyline” at all. There where chapters, weird scenes where vikings raped each other and a dude painted red.

As a movie this pretty much sucked. I’m sorry to say that because it was beautifully shoot in some remarkable locations. The vikings looked authentic and the CG blood was some of the best I’ve seen.

Guy’s Rating: I don’t think you need to bother. I just wished that someone, anyone could make a good viking movie.

ROBIN HOOD

Girl’s say...

After watching this movie in theaters, you couldn’t help but remember the similarities to Gladiator. During the watch, though, you went along with it because the actors are top notch and everything looks great. Plus! It was just a fun movie.

Russell Crowe - great actor, good looking, badass but steady. There have been better Robin Hood’s, but I still believed him in this role. Hood was known for his leadership, good morals, and inability not to ignore a thrown gauntlet (i.e.. the target contest the Sheriff puts on in the olden movies). Although more subtle than most Hoods, Crowe’s version still hit all those points.

Perhaps one could argue there could have been “more” to the movie, as it just did not hit the great adjective... But I would disagree. It was what it was - a fun, interesting prequel to an old tale.

Girl’s Rating: Not as good as usual, Ridley, but still worth watching when it hits the DVD shelf.

Guy’s Review...

Ridley Scott will always be a genius when it comes to details. This movie is big and stunning. Everything is lined up perfectly and all the actors fit their parts well.

This is the prequel to all the other Robin Hood movies. This is the story of how the man became the legend. I was in for some good theiving. Well, there was barely any of that. The only thing he steal are some armor and a little bit of seed. In this movie Robin Longstride has to pretend to be a Lord’s son. The reason for this is that the real son died in the war and the father is afraid to loose his land if he doesn’t have an eir.

King Richard has also died in the war and the crown has gone to his dimwitted brother John who put his buddy Godfrey in charge of state (I think). Godrey is working with the french behind John’s back and starts a trouble in the name of the King all over England all to fuck with the relationship between the King and his country. Robin shows up and reunites the people and takes the French down.

One of the things I didn’t like about the movie was the backstory to Robin Hood. There was flashbacks to him as a child where we get to see his father standing for a cause that Robin takes up in later movies and stories. I could have done without out it.

One thing that I loved was Sweden’s own Max Von Sydow. He acted circles around Hollywoods elite with little effort. Long live Max Von Sydow! He goes from a shitty movie like “Solomon Kane” and then to a movie like this where he kicks ass. The old man does whatever he wants.

Guy’s Rating: Ridley is a pro.

THE NEGOTIATOR

Guy’s Review...

Apparently this is one of those movies that are always played on TV in Canada. I wish they would play more of these “oldies” here in Sweden.

I had almost forgot everything about this movie. The only thing I remembered was that Sam Jackson was a negotiator that got fucked over and that Kevin Spacey showed up to help him little bit.

This movie has a bunch of twists and turn and I was surprised that I couldn’t figure out the badguy this time around neither. That’s pretty much what this movie is, a decent thriller with some good action scene. Sam Jackson screaming delivery was then and still is today a treat.

Guy’s Rating: Watch it when it plays on TV.

Girl’s Kevin Spacey is gay...

Yes. He is. The form-fitting ski suit should have been a red flag for all of us. The second? K-PAX. But that's another review, which probably will never happen.

Anyway, this movie IS a TV classic in Canada. I’ve watched it a dozen times growing up - catching bits and pieces on the tele. I wouldn’t say it shaped my love for action films, and I do love action films, nor would I say that I would pick this out of the rental shelf on a week night. Still, good action, good twist, good cast.

Girl’s Rating: Good movie. Not great.

THE MUMMY RETURNS

Guy’s Review...

Yepp, we watched this again as well. I’m actually a fan of the two first mummy movies. Maybe because they came out when there was nothing remotely close to the Indiana Jones films. Brendan Fraiser filled a little bit of the void that Harrison Ford left behind and took part of these decent films.

ILM did a bang up job on the effects because they holdup really well even with movies like “Avatar” and “Transformers” pushing the envelope. The comedy... I snickered a little bit from time til time but no more than that. I don’t know if you should have all three in your movie collection but the first two are a nice edition.

Oh, and yeah, The Rock looks fucking awesome as the half man half scorpion thing.

Guy’s Rating: Still good.

Girl’s questionable...

Right. So. I’m going to ignore that Guy loves these films... for some crazy reason.

The good? I liked the fact the Rachel Weiz is some Pharaoh's reincarnated daughter. Contrived? Yes. Totally should have been mentioned or hinted at in the first flick? Yes. But that didn’t make me like it any less.

The bad? The kid. Agh. We already have to deal with the imbecile brother - adding a number two doesn’t help ease the blunt comic relief device.

And the Rock DOES NOT look fucking awesome as the half man half scorpion thing. The only good thing about this was that he couldn’t pull out The People’s Elbow, as he did in The Scorpion King movie. Awful.

Girl’s Rating: Should have stopped with the first one.