UNCERTAINTY

Girl's brooding review...

This movie should not have been called Uncertainty, it should have been called Unnecessary. Ha! Bad jokes excluded, this movie was really awful.

A little fun fact for you readers: This movie was written with no dialogue. Smart move? Nope. The actors, with the director's help, would create the conversation through rehearsals, and this was obvious right from the first stilted, halting, obscure conversation between the two main characters on the Brooklyn bridge.

The gist of the movie was this... Two people in a relationship make a choice and live through the consequences of that choice. The twist is that they get to make both choices. The girl, in a yellow dress, runs off to follow the choice of abandoning family and living with her beau, expecting their child, in a fun-filled adventure-full life... With guns and crazy chinamen. The guy, in green shirt and shoes, runs off with his girl to dedicate their lives to family, hearth and home - no matter how dysfunctional. They are both the same couple, and the colors yellow and green help you to differentiate the story lines (as though action gun story versus drama family story isn't enough). But! In case you missed the fact you are following duel story lines about the same characters, they even flash the word "YELLOW" and "GREEN" over them in the beginning of the film.

Girl's Rating: Did I say this movie should be called unnecessary? Bad joke or not, it's the truth.

Guy's yawn...

What can I say that Girl hasn't already said. This movie was, as girl said, unnecessary. If you can't even bother writing a full script, then don't bother directing a full feature movie. This has been done before, don't get me wrong, and it has on certain occasions worked out. That type of filmmaking is called Dogma (watch "Celebration" from Denmark). This, however, is not a Dogma movie, this was a full-fledged cinematic experience.

As Girl said, this movie takes off on two separate story lines, yellow and green. This is to help the audience differentiate between the two. Green: Nothing happens. The girl is pregnant and they have to go to her parents barbecue. Yellow: They find a phone that belongs to a homicidal maniac. This might sound really exciting, but no. They just keep changing positions and wait for the bad guy to show up and then there's a little chase scene.

I have a little advice for this "filmmaker". Write a whole frickin' script the next time. You won't come off as a lazy douche.

Guy's Rating: Don't watch it. There's no uncertainty in that (I also made a joke of the title).