A Note...

... to our loyal readers.

Guy is in Sweden, currently, and Girl is in Canada. No, we did not split up, as one of you has commented, but we do come from different sides of the world and this tends to happen when you are stupid enough to get involved in a long distance relationship.

So! To those of you who are expecting this website to be kept up to date on a regular basis (even after the fact that this has never happened so far), you will be disappointed.

But! We will try to watch the same movies, and we will try to write reviews about them at some point, then try to post those reviews on a semi-timely basis... maybe.

Some of you may call this a stilted promise, but we just call it reality. Unlike Lindsay Lohan, we have our feet planted firmly in it.

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Thursday, February 11, 2010

UNIVERSAL SOLDIER: REGENERATION


Guy’s review...


First off, I knew this was gonna be bad. I mean really bad. The only reason I watched the whole movie was because I saw the original, which was awesome by the way. I also have some love for the great Jean-Claude Van Damme, I mean when I was growing up with movies like “Kickboxer”, “Death Warrant”, “Double Impact” and the great gem “Bloodsport”. If you haven’t seen those movies I would advice you to watch them soon.


So what happens in this third installment of the now dead UniSol series? Well, they brought back Dolph for a couple of minutes and kill him off again. Van Damme is a sad UniSol that’s in therapy. Some soldiers burst in and they take him to a lab where they “reboot” him and turn him into a killing machine... again. He is now used to take out a terrorist group that has taken a nuclear power plant hostage.


This is a horrible, horrible movie and if you’re a fan of Van Damme then you might even shed a tear. It actually looks like JCVD himself is about to shed a bunch of tears when he’s on the screen in this “film”. Maybe he remembers how great he was and has put himself into a deep depression. So please, If you have any good memories left of this once great action hero preserve them by not watching this disaster.


Guy’s Rarting: Should be pretty clear by now.


Girl's review...


This was the worst movie I have seen this year. Just shit. The only good part was the one bad guy. One out of the five bad guys! Pathetic. And I'm not talking about the cliche scientist, but the real bad guy who has good intentions but a bad work ethic. The russian or whatever, and even his character was one dimensional. The actor is the one that saved that part. That scientist, though... He should have died before the script was released for production. Everything he said, everything he did... He should have just steepled his fingers together and laughed madly, he was that pathetic of a character. So useless, a waste of paper and money... Agh, I hated him.


Girl's rating: A sad attempt at film making.

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